A Modern Woman's Perspective On The Kingdom of God on Earth

August 29, 2015

This Is A Time Of Personal Testing

     I am sure that many of you can identify with me during these times of crisis.  We are all probably feeling some sense of anxiety or apprehension; we are feeling under pressure, or perhaps even panicky.  The ups and downs of the stock market are showing us that our economic futures are on shaky ground.  By now we have all seen evil played out in real time as the broadcast of the murders in Virginia goes viral.   All kinds of rumors of civil unrest, racial tension, homeland terrorism, and world war abound.  Nothing feels secure and we are all feeling vulnerable.
    Yes, I can identify with those emotions.  In a way, they never leave me because the worldly security of our household is affected by all of these events.  So yes, I too, have my moments of doubt and panic.  There is the reality of the number that is in our checkbook... it can only be stretched so far.  And the nature of our self-employed business is that it can disappear at any moment.  I find myself trying to look into the future, plotting and planning how I am going to make all this work; trying to devise a strategy to sustain us until things settle back down again and our life resumes a more reliable (and monetarily certain) pace.
Ever feel like you're alone in the desert?
     But my spirit knows the truth -- there is no security in this world.  And what the world calls security is false (money, peace of mind, stability in our lives, etc.)  So my spirit is grieving because I know, as a Christian, that this behavior is testing God.  Instead I should be trusting Him.  Because, you see, my spirit knows that He made a covenant with my husband and myself over 20 years ago.  He would be faithful to provide for all our needs, if we would be faithful to put our trust in Him; if we would have confidence that He was who He said He was, and would do what He said He would -- if we would simply exercise our faith.  And just as is so often quoted from the Bible, faith is the assurance of things hoped for, and the conviction of things not seen.
    In other words, God has been unceasingly faithful to us, and has kept His covenant with us.  But by taking my eyes and heart off Him, I have lost my focus.  And when I look for solutions in this world, my mind is no longer protected from the lies that Satan whispers.  Can you identify?
    And so, for what seems like an endless cycle, I tighten my spiritual armor, re-adjusting those parts that have slipped out of place.  I adapt my line of vision -- away from the dark corners where my Enemy is taunting me, and towards the brilliant Light that conquers the darkness.  Soon I am able to see more clearly.  I adjust my thoughts, reaffirm that I belong to God, and get back on the path that leads me to His will for my life.
     I don't know about you, but there are moments when I have nearly supernatural clarity of the inter-dimensional aspects of this world and the heavenly realms.  When I am blessed with that coherent spirit, I am able to see that all the material substance of my life here on earth is secondary to the existence of my spirit seated with Jesus in Heaven.  All these worries and concerns over health, finances, family struggles, taxes, even war -- they are only momentary and worthless compared to the riches that will be my inheritance in Heaven.  And that reward or legacy is eternity with Jesus.
     In those lucid moments when my spirit recognizes that Truth, I am able to let go of all that holds me prisoner and earthbound.  And I am free!  Oh, how I wish this flesh was not so corrupt -- that I could hold on to those moments of deliverance from this world and its troubles.  But even though that vision is fleeting, I am determined to hang on to it as part of my spiritual arsenal of weapons to defeat the lies of Satan.  My earthly reality is what it is; but I also know how God views His covenants with those who have answered His call.  He is faithful even when we are unfaithful.  I regret and repent of the sorrow I have caused Him whenever I test Him and respond to temptation.  And I am grateful that He continues to give me those glimpses of my glorious future, and I will praise Him out loud and sing of His glory!  I will hang on to His promises; continue to battle the darkness; while waiting on Him and renewing my strength.  If you share in these struggles with me, I pray that you are able to join me in overcoming this world and looking forward to our victory in Jesus!

Psalm 27: 1, 14:    The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid? ...  Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!


  1. I can relate 100%. In fact, I have been going through this the past week, and just yesterday made the decision to snap out of it. All though it is very hard and I find myself wanting to slip right back into my worries. So I have decided to take it slow, one day, one minute, one second at a time. I know what is coming, and I also feel a deep faith that I ( and my family ) am being protected. I see it all the time. But it is still hard. Thank you for your post.

    1. I have decided that I am going to wage spiritual warfare by greeting each morning and proclaiming out loud, "Thus saith the Lord ..." and then I am going to recite Jeremiah 29:11: For I know the thoughts and plans I have for you, thoughts and plans for your welfare and peace, and not for evil; to give you hope in My final outcome."
      Thus saith the Lord: "Now to Him who by His power that is at work in me, is able to carry out His purpose and do it abundantly, far over and above all that I dare ask or think. To Him be glory in the Church and in Yeshua throughout all generations forever and ever. Amen-- so be it." (Ephesians 3:20-21)
      Thus saith the Lord: "And the peace of God will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:7)

  2. Wanted to share with you that I have been praying Psalm 91 over my family. We can cling to God's promises for our lives. He is faithful and He will not let us stumble. He has protected those that are His over the last 6,000 years and we have those accounts written in His living Word! I think about how He rescued so many people (during those years) prior to His wrath of judgment being poured out on men and it makes me hopeful that He will rescue us unto Himself through the rapture before His full wrath is unleashed. He is patient and tarries as long as He can, because He desires that no man should perish, and I am thankful for that. I just found out my aunt gave her life to Christ in the Nursing Home! Praise the Lord that she had the chance to do that!

    1. Praise God for your aunt's salvation! And I believe that we will not suffer God's final wrath and judgment upon the wicked, and it will be our faith that will see us through the tribulations (however severe they may be). He will see us through our time on this earth, and will never leave us nor forsake us. Until then we must be about our work, carrying out His purpose for our lives, glorifying and praising Him!