My Testimony: "Gloom, Despair, and Agony on Me"!

If you're of a certain age, you might remember that comedy hour of country songs and humor, called HeeHaw. The title of today's blog comes from one of their theme songs sung by residents of Kornfield Kounty, lamenting the sad state of their lives. "Gloom, Despair, and Agony" was a comedic poke at the imaginary problems of simple country folk. But more and more, it's becoming the theme song for the lives of millions of Americans, as they face an uncertain future filled with fear, anxiety, and worry.

Let me begin by saying that, as a believer in Jesus Christ, I have had to overcome my own struggles with these three spiritual adversaries and the havoc they can cause in pursuing a contented and prosperous life. It didn't matter that I knew all the Scriptures that told me that Jesus had not given me a spirit of fear, or that the Bible tells us we will endure sorrows and sufferings so that we might follow in the steps of our Savior, overcoming as He did. They did not defeat the thoughts that continued to repeat themselves over and over, keeping me in a state of instability and what the Bible calls "an unsound mind".

It wasn't until I was 40 years old, and spending some time caring for my father after his multiple bypass surgery that I understood the "spiritual mechanics" of my inability to find peace and a deeper measure of faith. As I laid in my bed, I could hear my father moaning in anxiety and worry over his health and the absence of my mother, who had passed away a few years before. At a very minimal level, I began to see where my own fears and worry about the future had originated. I was able to see his pattern throughout my childhood, and into adulthood, of worrying about finances and the unforeseen battles of life. I was just like my dad! 

But I also realized that I had accepted Christ as my Savior and Deliverer, while he had not. And I recognized that other members of our family -- aunts, uncles, and cousins -- also struggled with worry and anxiety, brought on by fear. Some were believers, some were not; but I didn't want to be like them! It would be years until I understood the Biblical concept of iniquity. And it was through my pursuit of a more intimate relationship with Jesus that I would hear the voice of my Heavenly Father which changed the course of my life. I can also look back now, and see the narrow path He led me and my husband on; a path He had carefully laid out since the foundations of the world. 

Ever since we made the decision, early in our marriage, that my husband would follow the unconventional path of a professional artist, using the talents we acknowledged came from God, Mark never doubted or worried. Even during the years of "paying his dues" and building his career -- the years of wondering if we could pay our monthly bills -- he always [simply and  resolutely] trusted God for everything. Me, not so much! I was still struggling with the trifecta of my old adversaries: worry, anxiety, and fear. It wasn't until I found myself in what I call my "seven years in the wilderness", that I submitted to God and asked Him to help me trust Him. These were the years where I found myself isolated on 129 acres, about 90 miles west of San Antonio. Without the distractions of our lives in Austin and Houston, I was faced with lots of time for meditation and contemplation. They were the years when our struggles were the most difficult, and the years my fears were the most prominent, yet they were the years that I made the most forward progress in my faith.

As I said, I had had enough of living in the shadow of the spirit of fear, and I knew my constant worrying had to be getting tiresome to my husband, although he always patiently pointed me towards trusting Jesus. Then one day, I had this profound thought. It wasn't the audible voice of the Lord, but what I had begun to recognize as His thoughts that He revealed to my mind. I heard, "If you will be faithful to Me, I will be faithful to you". Wow! What a promise! Did I have enough faith to trust Him to fulfill that vow? Could I finally let go of my earthly father's voice in my head telling me that I had to work hard to control my finances; that it was all up to me?

I'm not going to tell you that it was easy. There were many times in the ensuing years that the Enemy tried to shake my confidence in Jesus and the Father; times of struggle, wondering where the next art sale would come from to pay the looming bills. And you know what? Every time God delivered on His promise! With each divine testimony He gave me, I was learning to trust Him and not succumb to the doubt and unbelief that the devil so desperately wanted me to pick back up. I was building a history of trust with God! Even to this day, the one who got thrown out of Heaven tries to convince me that I can't trust the One who has so faithfully provided all that I need in this life.

And as I trusted God for my earthly essentials, He showed me that my husband and I could be trusted to receive greater revelations of His sovereignty in the world. And He anointed us with a ministry that has allowed us to share how He overcame our own wounds and insecurities. Because we became yoked together in trusting Him to guide us to the purpose for which we were created, we are able to see the ways that the Enemy disrupts the lives of others and builds obstacles to the discovery of their purposes for His Kingdom here on earth. One of the biggest is that iniquity in family lines that I mentioned was so prominent in my own. And I want to give you a quick synopsis on its effects, so you can break it off yourself and your family.

I want to point out both Exodus 20:5-6 and Deuteronomy 5:9-10. [Whenever God confirms His commandments again, we know this is an important precept that He wants us to get!]. They both read: You shall not bow down to them or serve them, for I the Lord your God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and the fourth generation of those who hate Me, but showing steadfast love to thousands of those [generations] who love Me and keep My commandments. It is important that the body of Christ understands this spiritual principle. INIQUITY is when a sin [as in my family's case; worry and not trusting God], moves beyond a one-time occurrence, which can be confessed and repented for, and it ends. When that sin then moves into open rebellion [knowing it's a sin, but it is continued to be practiced], and is still not confessed and repented and stopped -- then it becomes embedded in the actual DNA of the family line. 

You can apply any sin to iniquity ... think of families who will say, "we're just a family of alcoholics'. Substitute any sin in that sentence -- adultery, molestation, pornography, pedophilia, lying, greed -- you get the picture. And interestingly enough, it will go three or four generations, until a righteous member of the family declares, "It stops with me"! In my case, I was the third generation, and recognized the sin of worry and stopped it. But I see it in some of my nieces and nephews, the fourth generation, because my siblings are still blinded to the iniquity in our family bloodline. And if it doesn't get stopped, it will continue unimpeded.

So, I want to summarize my testimony and speak my heart ... Don't let "Gloom, Despair, and Agony" become your theme song. Yes, the world is exhibiting lots of reasons to give in to these corresponding spirits of worry, anxiety, and fear. But if nothing else, I hope you heard how I overcame them with the help of the Lord. If, like me, you have become tired of living in a constant state of instability and not trusting the Lord, submit to Him; surrender and tell Him you are ready to be faithful to Him, choosing to believe [even in the midst of your doubt and unbelief] that He will be faithful to you. 

Take it from me, you CAN TRUST HIM! Never forget that Jesus tells us, "In Me, you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world". And that word tribulation encompasses all your trials; all your struggles, all the injustices perpetrated against you; anything that you worry about or are tempted by. And you "may" have the peace you long for -- it's up to you. But will you trust Him to be faithful to you? Start building that trust today, as you take the first step in being faithful to Him. It will change your life and set you on the path you are destined for!

2 Chronicles 16:9    For the eyes of the Lord move to and fro throughout the earth so that He may support those whose heart is completely His...

 

   

How Do You Recognize A Christian?

I've been thinking a lot lately about the state of the Christian faith and how we will measure up to the coming troubles that the world seems to be hurtling towards. Which got me to pondering how the world will view us, and exactly what will be expected of us in the midst of our uncertain future. What's more, what do we expect from each other? Do we know what we are supposed to do, and will we recognize our responsibilities as Christians?

These days, being called a Christian is not necessarily applauded in our culture. The name "Christian" has become so entangled with social, cultural and political causes that the secular population judges us by whether they agree with which side of these issues we come down on. Maybe the better question is, how will we know each other, and how do we want to be recognized?

Some will say we should be appreciated and recognized for our declaration and obedience to our faith. And the Bible says, faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. But how does that identify us to a lost world? Where is the evidence of faith? The proof? How did the 1st Century Christians identify as ... well, Christians? What was it that made the world take note of them and see that they were different from the rest of mankind? 

The Bible's Book of Acts gives us the best historical view of what that era looked like from the perspective of those who had to decide who they were and what they were supposed to do. The First Century was arguably one of the most dangerous times in the history of Christianity. The success of Jesus's assignment on earth rested on the actions, deeds, and words of a few men and women who dared to represent the new faith in the face of an Empire and a religious system that were determined to eradicate them and stamp out the embers of a growing movement that threatened to spread like wildfire. 

In the First Century, if you walked in your Christian faith, you could expect to be persecuted by both the Roman Empire and the Jewish authorities, both of whom felt threatened because this new Christianity didn't follow the rules of their established class systems. Christians treated everyone as equal, and were willing to share all they had with those less fortunate. Christians were willing to lose everything they had -- their prestige and influence, even their lives -- to follow a radical idea of putting others before yourself. Furthermore, they had the boldness and courage to argue that God was the exclusive authority in their lives; above the Emperor and the Rabbi!

That's a rather simplified version of what Christianity in the Book of Acts was all about. The influence of Christians was much more radical, bold, and costly than what I've written. This was the time when Christians were fed to the lions as stadiums full of people roared their approval. It was a time when Christians were used as human torches by the Emperor Nero. Their villages and synagogues were burned and they had to flee to the hills in order to survive. Ultimately, the faithful Disciples had to decide if they were going to fade back into Jewish society and hide out from the Romans who saw them as dissidents, or whether they truly believed what Jesus had taught them and commanded them ... to take the Gospel to Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria, and the ends of the earth. Once the Holy Spirit came on them in power [just as Jesus said He would], there was no denying the truth and the power of this new "Way" that they were to live. 

And it is important to understand why Jesus chose those particular places. He wanted His disciples to be a witness about Him in Jerusalem (where He was crucified); in Judea (where His ministry was rejected by His fellow Jews); in all of Samaria (where the Disciples looked down on the inhabitants of the land who were Israelites that had intermarried with the foreigners and adopted their idolatrous religion); and to the ends of the earth (where they were strangers and would be witnessing to people who knew nothing of their faith). In other words, this new faith of Christianity was open to everyone -- to those who were your declared enemies; to people who were open sinners; and to people whom you have nothing in common with. Jesus was leaving us a record of what it looked like to call yourself a Christian, and it was a thoroughly and comprehensively revolutionary idea!

So, do we fit that description? Are we willing to surrender our pride and worldly comforts to offer everyone a picture of Christ? Are we bold enough to stand out in the world and willing to pay the price to call ourselves a Christian? Are we strong enough to go it alone with an assignment that Christ gives us -- or do we need the comfort and safety of the Christian crowd? In the First Century, if you were willing to be called a Christian, it was a certainty that your life would be radically altered as you embarked on a lifestyle that bore fruit for the glory of Jesus and God. Has your lifestyle changed? Is there evidence that you are separate from the culture? Are you willing to walk in uncomfortable and unfamiliar circumstances to share who Jesus is in your life, and who you are in His Kingdom? 

Yes, it was dangerous and difficult to be a Christian in the First Century. But do not be deceived into believing that the world accepts us more today than it did 2000 years ago. And I'm not talking about "nominal" Christians; those who are Christians in name only, and because they call themselves by that title. Those Christians will be able to assimilate into the world that's coming. I'm talking about Christians like those in the Book of Acts; those who understood they were in the cross-hairs of both the political and religious governmental bodies... and they didn't back down. It is these Christians who will know the persecution, discrimination, tyranny and oppression of a world that wants nothing to do with Christ. 

BUT, we have the knowledge and the confidence that the Christians who walk in the authentic faith and ways of our Lord Jesus, will be part of God's holy remnant. They will carry the hope of victory, restoration, and a return to God's righteous ways. They will receive power, authority, and favor to carry out their assignments and glorify God, the Father; Jesus, the Son; and the Holy Spirit. Now is the time to make a decision if you will be that Christian! I have no doubt that there are those of us who have made that decision and will walk in genuine and sincere Christianity... and I look forward to recognizing you! 

#realchristianity #authenticfaith #christianidentity #christianremnant

1 John 2:19   They went out from us [seeming at first to be Christians], but they were not really of us; for if they had been of us, they would have remained with us; but they went out, so that it would be clearly shown that none of them are of us.